Video installation, 2020/ from the series “Useful (Ab)use”
Many victims of intimate partner violence excuse and embellish the behavior of violent people, minimize the violence associated with them, and try to find something good in their relationship with them. This is a psychological survival strategy: otherwise it would not be possible to endure an intimate relationship with the abuser. At the same time, this same tool/strategy does not allow us to notice that violence increases over time. It does not allow us to notice psychological or self-esteem changes. It does not allow us to recognize the moment when violence is no longer just mentally or physically disabling, but life-threatening.
The victim tries to retain the most important thing in himself – kindness and love – by becoming a suffering hero. But for what? The value of a heroic act is revealed only after leaving such a relationship. Kindness can also be practiced safely, outside of an abusive relationship.
The situations on the screen are a fiction created with the help of MTÜ Toomteater and Anne Türnpu.
Fotod: Annika Haas, Jüri Vlassov
